1. |
(I) Totesworth
02:03
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2. |
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we hear the truck resound (while) driving home bound.
no one makes a sound as the silence starts to propound:
"what is this? something's amiss.
do you really care about these kids?
don't build pyramids for those who are remiss.
it's useless."
through this subtomane we remain the same.
driving through disdain, i hear the silence say:
"listen, now. can you hear the row?
don't you know they think you're middlebrow?
is this fellowship really worth it?
you could use a pinch-hit."
my friends here; they can't hear anything that i'm thinking.
so what is your stereo playing?
i thought i heard you mislay a sobriquet in disarray
(while) speeding down the freeway.
is it too late?
we hesitate far too often.
southbound isn't home bound.
yet we sail to reach unobtainable contentment and success.
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3. |
Packed like Parachutes
05:35
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we lost our minds in the town that we grew up in.
we wasted our time on the kids we went to school with.
escaping the influence of the churches
we found ourselves, together, playing music.
just like old times;
take a hit.
pass that shit.
hold it.
bar the doors of the house that you grew up in.
hiding from the step father you grew up with.
don't you dare drive home.
i know how much you hate him.
"unhinged dialogue that permeates disrespect."
why don't we tell ghost stories for hours?
hiding/sitting about your house hearing noises that frighten us to the bone.
who is screaming?
you're keeping me up at night.
you're so goddamn uptight.
you've too much imagination.
forgive my hesitation.
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4. |
GL!HF!DD!
05:30
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it came to us as we returned; a rather paralyzing placard.
tidings written out in ink.
it wasn't hard to discern
(so) i found everything that i could live without to sell
to keep this place standing on its too feet.
although, i can see it crumbling from within.
honestly?
i wouldn't be surprised if it fell.
there's a lot for them to say.
i'm just a visitor observing dismay.
a cacophony of words.
stronger than the blizzards in this town.
i can almost hear the pieces falling
around every single one of us in this house.
yet we try to keep it from falling down
at least for now we'll keep these people standing on the ground.
it's far too much to think about right now.
so let's enjoy the time we have right now.
because in years this won't even matter.
because in years we won't talk to each other.
because in years we'll forget this even happened.
because time heals all wounds they say
and none of you really mattered anyway
so good luck my friends!
i hope to see you all again someday.
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5. |
Weak Ends
03:31
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you can't get sober even if you said you tried
all of your friends, what they say is right
a plethora of words defines your speech
a harbinger of negativity
and i am sick of listening
you always say the same goddamn thing
you say everything will be just fine
(but) i know you're lying.
this fucking place is deafening
we can't hear anything
i can't hear anything
i hate to be a burden.
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6. |
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you bailed me out around this time of year
my mugshot showed just how bad i look in tears
the wind picked up and your smile grew
it was then we knew that it was time to leave
my hometown.
just us three.
we packed our bags and burned bridges
our friends warned us of the dangers
but we set sail anyway
i've got it bad
i've never moved away.
you grabbed my hand and softly said that it will be okay.
bigger cities, different places
is this what you call running away?
these thoughts are overwhelming, but i'm glad we didn't stay
your heart is overtaking me (and) i think we made a mistake.
but it will be okay.
i thought we'd run away
and we thought we were here to stay
but the water was too deep
so we drowned quietly.
it didn't matter then
and it doesn't matter now
but we'll still make it out.
right?
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7. |
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8. |
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i recall the bitter taste of adderall
the smell of dust
and paintings hanging in the hall.
(and) those beatnik kids with such 'heavy opinions'
are aggressive with their assumptions.
and yet you sleep, but not peacefully.
you said you dreampt of seven of men around your bed
you slammed the door into his fist. that's what he said.
those stories you wrote? (they) didn't come without consequence.
you locked yourself in your apartment
climbed to the roof
and then jumped off it.
and when you landed you broke your ankle
and when you cried for help you couldn't find it.
when they came, they took you away to a place where i knew you wouldn't feel safe.
when i arrived your eyes said it all
but i was pulled aside to talk about it.
he said he knew me, but he knew my father.
i answered his questions (for) he was just a doctor.
and when i went outside there was snow on the ground
the lot was empty (and) i couldn't make a sound
she asked for a light
i asked for a smoke
she said "he'll be alright"
i said "i don't know"
you were the one to get me off my fight
you said you gotta start doing something
you packed your bags and clothes and hit the road.
and when you returned
you were dissociative.
i went home
my head hung low
i lit up another cigarette
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9. |
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it's an afterthought.
after all, we let each other down
by the time we'd reached our destination
our tiny ship had already been warped by the storms we'd been through.
so we began building a home upon the shore.
we used our bare hands to build a foundation
neither of us were architects but we were proud of our house
we used it as shelter and it worked for a while
but when the hurricane hit
i was left outside
(good ol' Alan Watts)
i was a mess
and the house we built for ourselves
began collapsing at its foundation
and i didn't see the debris
til it sat about our feet
it was then it became clear
we both succumbed to fear
and instead of looking it in the face
you ran away
like you always do.
please stay this time.
please stay.
but you've already gone away.
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10. |
Fish Tank!
06:22
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i can hardly see your face
yet it's so hard to erase
and the shaking in your voice
is far more telling than you think
my voice is shaking and you're not changing your mind
change is coming and i'm done running away
despite the hurricane, i'll stay afloat within this tiny sailboat
our atmosphere had been crumbling for months and i didn't prepare for the storm
no parables or miracles would save us
i let the water fill my lungs
blinded by the depths, i had lost you
but i didn't know you'd already surfaced
i felt my chest collapse within me
and on the inside i was screaming
and as you pulled yourself ashore
i met with the ocean floor
i've run out of things to say
and we've said all we need to
but still i go on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and ON AND OOOONNNN
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Emma Park Salt Lake City, Utah
Emma Park began as the solo work of Chas Hollingshead.
In June of 2017, Chas recruited Jared
Montgomery (bass/vocals), Fae Thayne(guitar), and Courtney Shane(drums) to fill out live shows.
Emma Park is currently based in Salt Lake City, Utah as of 2017.
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